Bolo Support Desk

Amazing how you can forget stuff! I was going through stuff and came across this video I made on my phone in 2015 to help with the Christmas baking....I had completely forgot about this! It was the year of the cupcakes, with the swirly frosting, and my mom wanted more explanation. What better way than a movie emulating my favorite cooking show while growing up. 

Disfruta - Rocco ft Jeon & Ritmo Real

Today is Thanksgiving. Even though I try to be grateful for each day that I get to wake up, under a roof, with food and health, today I want to pay some extra time on it.
Each year we have at least one dinner and there is always a moment to state what you are the most grateful for over the last year. This year I have just the one dinner, but for me it will be extra special because it will be with my little sister and her kids.
This year I am (extra) grateful for family. As I have often stated before, you have family that is given and family that is chosen. I am grateful for the whole lot.

My given family has been having some intense years and this last one was no different. But even though the lows were low, the highs are by far the things I remember. To be able to see my mom and dad spend time with the grand kids here, to grow in my relationship with my little sister and to see how we have all grown in character and strength, it makes me almost burst with love. The lesson I have learned is that there is always room for more kindness and my capacity to give is very stretchy.

And my chosen family, my Soeks and brother from another mother and sister from another mister and all of those who are far away but close to my heart, I am so happy to have been able to be there (and sometimes only just that, physically be there) at your hospital bed or your graduation, or just because you needed a hug (or an apple through whatsapp).

I keep saying it, we have a blessed life, and I am grateful for the lessons I have learned, especially through the tough times. And doubly so for all the wonderful good times we have had this year,
And for the coming year, I hope to finally have that valention and more perfect moments to collect with all of you.

Bida ta un ratu so, stima mas ku bo por, biba bon i hasi bon di bo kurason!

How do you want to be remembered?

What a week, eh? And I am not even starting about the election...All in all it has been an emotional few weeks. I have been behind my laptop several times to start typing, so much has happened since the last time I blogged, and then I lost the last blog I had already written but not posted yet, or started looking through pictures and got completely distracted and lost a few hours, then the threshold to start again became so high that I kept putting it off. (ooh and it bugs me so! I had this whole thing written about all the wonderful books I have been reading and about our new normal with me working….:o( really don’t understand what happened to that word file.)

But today I am checking a lot of things off my to do list and this is one of them! I have 3 word files open and will keep at it this time. The hubby is happy with his Hawaii Five-0 backlog, so we are both happy on the couch in this cold, cold weather. We were supposed to be going to a party later, but both the hosts are down for the count with the flu going around, and I just put on my sweats and must say, the couch is quite comfy.

But let me get to the recounting part of the blog. Last time I wrote, we had just decided on the date to have my parents over, and I can’t believe that has already been 3 months ago.

In September, school started again and I started working. It took some time to get used to the new routine, with me leaving the house veeeery early and getting home more than 12 hours later. I like what I am doing and love putting some hard-earned cash towards good stuff at the end of the month, the commute however….

The weather has been amazing all the way through October, but once wintertime set in, the cold felt welcome and settled right in. It has become harder and harder to find the energy to do all I usually do when the sun is out. But we have enough races to keep us running. With my appendix taken out a year ago, I have all these races I want to have a second go at this year and so far it seems I haven’t gotten worse at running. Not a lot better either, but as a new running mate said: you might not be faster, but you get over the finish line in much better shape than a year ago and that is also a victory! Joris can concur, he has to endure a lot less verbal abuse on the road ;o)

I was planning to go home to bake the yearly Christmas cakes, but the plug was finally pulled on that this week, it was just one trip too many this year. In the last few weeks, once again, I have been trying to do everything and do everything well, with a smile on my face, and it has been, let’s just say: challenging. I have passed my first exam for my Master’s on the skin of my teeth, on the second try, reading on the train on the way to and from work, barely being able to make time after/around work. As I was saving up for my ticket, I started doubting if me going to Curacao was the best use of the money, as I knew of some worthy other causes for an amount that big. It seemed like this time things were falling in their place, that after 6 six years of saying I was coming to bake, I would actually be there this year! Something told me to hold off on buying the ticket and I am happy we did. Circumstances changed, and it is the wise thing for me to stay here for December, and work the hours available. My salary has become essential in creating peace of mind for us and loved ones around us, so we chose to keep using it for that purpose.

I chickened out and called my dad to tell my mom that I was not coming. I did not sleep at all that night. The next day at work my mom send me a broken heart emoticon, that is how I knew that he had passed along the message. We apped a bit then and it was all I could to not to burst out in tears behind my desk. As it was a particularly busy day at work, and I had my earphones in to shut out everybody else to get my work done.

As had happened a few weeks ago, the perfect song came by at the perfect time. After my little existential crisis a few weeks ago, I have been thinking a lot about what makes me happy. In order to gain some perspective when I feel that I am stuck in a situation I cannot control or change, when I am dependent on unreliable people. It comes down to the same thing every time. I want to be a kind person. I want my parents and (chosen) family to be proud of me. Who cares if I pass my Master’s degree (at all or) with flying colors or if I take a bit more time getting things done at work?

The song that came by is a song by the band Magic! The words that stuck with me are these:

'Cause on the day when you face judgment
You better have your story straight
Were you a good friend and a husband
To the ones that give you love, love, love
Who you love, love, love

So since that day I have dialed back on school, and turned up the kindness factor. I have cooked and baked for busy families, send random happy cards to people around us and try to be more attentive and follow up with important events of people around me and making time to read more books. My sister has send me a kindness ninja challenge just in time! www.kindnessninja.me

Follow the sun - Xavier Rudd

I was having a really crappy day. Have been working fulltime for a few weeks, and while it may sound very spoiled, it was a bit much, with school and everything else going on. Lack of sun and sea never did me good. I miss the sea, never realized how of a island girl I am until I became landlocked here. We really have to start working towards our forever home. But that is another story altogether.

I hate it when everybody is sitting at their desk with headphones and not reacting to each other, but the (hardrock)music (no pun intended with all the geologists around me), was a bit more than I could take.

So I plugged in to and put the radio on random. This song came by. We know this song from a travel agency commercial on television. Never really listened to it, and never saw the clip.

I closed my eyes and just listened.

....When you feel life coming down on you, like a heavy weight.
When you feel this crazy society, adding to the strain.
Take a stroll to the nearest waters and remember your place.
Many moons have risen and fallen long, long before you came.

So which way is the wind blowin', And what does your heart say?

We are just dust blowing in the wind, so the best we can do is make our time here count. There is not enough time to be consistently unhappy with your situation. Change your situation. Work towards goals, stay open to change, don't hold on the ideas just for the heck of it, goals may change. What makes you happy today, might not tomorrow. Even while being responsible for my own things, there is still room for others. The most precious thing I can share is my undivided attention and time. 

I had some very interesting talks with a variety of people from my past and current world in the weeks after and that was good. I was really struggling with finding the room in my head and heart to be grateful of the things I had and had done and not be wistful of the things I could not accomplish right now. It is always good to re-calibrate with like-minded people. 

Time flies when you are having fun....

7 years ago today!

Summertime - Red Saunders

It is a good thing I can backdate these posts.....

This has been a weird year. The lows were looooow, but the highs sure made up for them. Every time I feel a bit blue these days I think back to one of the many wonderful achievements of the last few months and one of my favorites must be (besides my degree, of course) our trip to Singapore.

It was a bit spur of the moment (as I have blogged before, that is how we roll) but when we clicked and bought the tickets, we had a little happy dance in the living room.
As we stepped into our first 777 to fly 12 hours to see friends on the other side of the world, with our suitcases full of cheese, licorice, rice waffles and wine, it was fun from beginning to end.

Some of the highlights (not chronological): on our final night, we went out just the two of us to have dinner at a famous crab-house. Afterwards we walked through the club district and I heard some bachata coming out of one of the clubs. As we sat there in Singapore, drinking our Corona-ritas (yes, a margarita made with a Corona), with a live band, with salsadancing Singaporeans, with my Dutch husband that I met on my island, I became emotional at how blessed my life is.

Another highlight: our first ever Aquathlon. Swimming and then running. Also our first medal outside of Holland. Also a good lesson in planning: flying 12 hours and sleeping 8 and then a race, not smart....

Highlights: allllll the food. All of it. From the kopi toast to the hawker food, all of it was excellent.

And this day was a perfect day. We slept in a bit, Joris swam some laps and we went out, by foot, to this bakery that came highly recommended and was around the corner from a bookstore that was also highly recommended, We ate and then spend quite some time in the bookstore browsing and making new friends.

After the bookstore I went in search of water. It was so hot, we were guzzling water the whole day. I rounded the corner and saw a small bodega. As I walked in the music was so perfect in the environment! I knew the song, from another perfect moment last year when I Shazam-d it. I just stood there and let the moment wash over me, it was so good. 

Then we went to the Singapore Zoo, which was less perfect, but still an experience.

This is the Iris, just as pretty as my aunt Iris.

Dushi Bida - Jeon

6 days. That is the emotional and physical low point in my jetlag process. I get weepy and cuddly and miss home like crazy. Because that is usually why I am jetlagged in the first place, because I crossed the Atlantic to go to my other home. That small island, where part of my heart will always be.

It was awesome. Full stop.

To be able to take a full month off with the hubby and go to our other home, where we are lucky enough to have a amazing place to stay, with lots of furry roommates, was pure luxury.

And of course, this came on top of me graduating. Facts of life that are not real, until celebrated with the peeps at home.

All in all, good things.

Funny, however, how easy it is to become blind to all the riches around us. We had just gotten back from our vacation and I got this letter from the IRS, with my tax return. It was money I had not been counting on at all, money I was using to bring my parents to Holland. My mother has not met her two youngest grandsons and I had vowed to make it possible this year, not matter what.

I am extremely grateful that my husband and I are of the same frame of mind. A successful life is not having an expensive car, a big house and a boat, but we both measure success in the way we can change other peoples life. This was a very easy decision, to enable my parents to hug grandchildren, that I am able to cuddle on a weekly basis.

On day 6 of our return, I was online looking at prices on the KLM site. The tickets were a lot more expensive than I had hoped, so I was widening the search and got to cheaper tickets later in the year. But that meant that my kid sister would already start school and that would be stressful, with the kids and the parents around. So I called her and we hawed and hemmed about it and after I hung up, I went to take a shower, slightly frustrated that we could not find a good solution.

I often take music with me in the shower. Splash proof phone helps. As I was in the shower, the theme song of our vacation (and title of this blog) came on. I was singing along and suddenly, quite unexpectedly, I was bawling in the shower. After restarting the song, I listened to the lyrics more consciously and realized that it was the sentence that hit me, hard, was: tin hende ku ta sufri, mi ruman, tin mama ku no por drumi, mi ruman... (there are people suffering, bro, there are mothers who can not sleep, bro).

Here I am, making a huge fuss about not being able to find the perfect planning, for buying tickets for my parents, with money that was being handed to me, as I had just returned from a months (!) holiday on a tropical island, because my kid sister has passed through this grueling application process to start a new career, that was going to change her life and the life of her kids. Kids my mom has yet to meet.

Woman, get a grip. 

So after I had had a good cry, and a good, stern conversation with myself, I regrouped and basked in the glow of gratefulness. We have such a good life (dushi bida).

So I made this slideshow of our life the last few weeks, to remind ourselves how dushi our lives are. We really do have the most beautiful things around us, we have to open ourselves up for them, because we have today, who knows tomorrow. Which is the cliffs notes version of the lyrics of the song title of this post.

Up we go - Lights

Sometimes it is hard for me to see what is Dutch and what is not.... But in my world, no matter what side of the ocean, a schoolbag tied to a flagpole means only 1 thing: Someone graduated!

And this time, that person is ME!!!

All in all, March was a great month. Busy and full and also with challenging stuff for sure, but the good far outweighed the bad and we had a lot of giggles.

we ran some....

we started feeling the heat of the sun again...

Quality time at home

Feeeeeed me....

We started on the garden for the new growing season....

We had another mouse in the house...

The day of the resit

Started with a run

Some nutella

some breathing exercises

colored pens

And this time a big smile leaving the room!

We had more quality time outside of the house....

It has been a tunnelvisioned few weeks. Prepping for exam and spending time with the family was just about all that I could manage, but as soon as the exam was over, we started making up for lost social time with our family and friends. So if you don't see me online, is because we are playing outside!

And if you know of a nice job, I'm looking :D

Road rage - Catatonia

Happy new year!! For those I haven't spoken, seen or send a card that is...We have had a wonderful time around the holidays. And we started the year on a good note. In 2015 we had a running medal count competition, which I won (yay!), and we decided to start a new competition and did not bother to wait until the new year started. We have a started a penalty system for not exercising, the fat tax. Every week we have 1 free pass, but every other day we must exercise for at least 15 minutes. If you don't, 5 euro goes in the piggy. And not tomorrow, if you don't have it at hand, you have to get out of the house and go to the atm and get it. I must say it is really effective! As Joris is recovering from a very persistent injury, running has been less of a priority and strength training has taken a bigger role in our weekly routines, with all sore muscles that go along with that.

Another reason for sore muscles has been that Arjan and I have been doing some chores around the house for Kwek. That meant that I had quite some hours in the car this week. Which I don't mind, especially with some good music on. I am sometimes so happy to be as old as I am....Going from Aerosmith- Amazing to Bon Jovi - This ain't a lovesong to Catatonia - Road rage, belting it out as hard as I can....good times.

And that is the reason for the title of this post. As things didn't go as planned, and mostly ended up taking up a lot more time than expected, putting my own plans on hold, it was good to spend some time with Arjan, talking about it and other stuff. As before, when we were on vacation together, it is humbling to see the way he motivates his choices and how easy he prioritizes main issues from side issues. At the moment, there was nothing in my life that was more important than being there for my sister and to be there by proxy for my parents. We live a blessed life, with room to spare for others, in time, energy and love. So it was good to start the year off with sharing quality time for a good cause. 

'Cause that is my role at the moment: 

If all you've got to do today is find peace of mind

Come round you can take a piece of mine

And if all you've got to do today is hesitate

Come here, you can leave it late with me

You could be taking it easy on yourself

You should be making it easy on yourself

from Road Rage - Catatonia

And the winner of 2015 is: Soeks! For that I got an extra medal :)

Fat tax piggy still empty

The couple that works out together, creates a lot of laundry together....

No fireworks stress, just who is that cat in my garden stress

Buurman en Buurvrouw building at Kwek's