Gee I'm glad its raining - Ernest

Last Monday my husband turned 34. He never really wants to celebrate his birthday, and this year I did not fight him on it. So 7 balloons and one garland and 1 medium cake with the family was all we did this year. There has been a lot going on and I was not feeling particularly festive anyway...

School was a lot harder than I expected and I saw all my extreme efforts of last year going down the drain as I am in no way passing the emergency course I had to take to complete my minor. I got sick the first week of the year, which in a three week course period puts you so far behind, it's quite impossible to catch up. Especially if it is a chemistry course, my weakest subject by far. So no diploma in the fall. All of which sucked.

But nothing compares to the other big thing going on.
Last year just before the summer, we were in Kampen for fieldwork with my year. We knew then, for a while, that our classmate Sangeeta (then 19) had been diagnosed with a tumor in the stem of her brain. Double vision, the loss of some use of her arm and other issues were starting to show, but still she joined us.
To make a long and sad story short, at the beginning of this year we got the news that the doctors told her that nothing could be done. To build new memories and say goodbye. A final round of chemo was the only option of treatment possible, but it would be a hard one.
So we rallied as a class and were busy thinking of things we could to to help. We are putting together a book of pictures and well wishes and getting everybody involved, her teachers, our friends and families to help with some financial stress relief. Within a week, we had 800 euro. We are planning another cupcake sale next week to reach the 1400 we wanted for a overdue bill the family has.

Everybody thought we had more time....We were there last Sunday, her best friends and me, her class-mom. We came to tell her about the fundraising and just visit with her. We left telling her we would see her next weekend, before the family would go on an all expense paid trip to a special medical vacation facility to get away for a bit.
And then we woke up to the message that Sangeeta has passed last night.

Words are not adequate to express the feeling of complete unbelief and the frustration of unfairness that is going through me now. So I will try with dance....